Socially Awkward Penguin Me

Have you seen this meme? It's basically a diagram of my life. With penguins.

Can't count the number of times I've done this. Most recently I wished a friend happy birthday (on my birthday) the year before last, on my 34th.

That's right, I can't remember what I ate for breakfast yesterday, but embarrassing memories are there for life. Way to go, brain.

Um, yes. I've walked into a hanging pot plant and apologised to it. In my defense, I may not have been entirely sober at the time. Witnesses to the event probably don't remember it as vividly as I do.

Oh lord. This is an especially awkward one that I seem to have gotten myself mired in on a few occassions. The problem is that I usually give people the benefit of the doubt, thinking I may have just misheard them - but then further down the track, I realise they are calling me Kylie. Or Kaylee. Or Renee. Or Emma. Or Helen.

My yoga teacher in London called me Helen for the first 6 months I was going to his class. I didn't correct him because I couldn't be sure he was talking to me (I was generally upside down or facing away from him at the time). MASSIVELY AWKWARD.

The number of times this has happened to me... and the 'd'oh!' that echoes around your head when you realise you've missed your chance to say that really funny/clever/appropriate thing.

High School is the peak awkward phase - for me, and for most people I suspect. I remember preparing to give a presentation in class and counting down the number of other students who'd done theirs so I could calculate the odds of me being called on next (we were called up AT RANDOM. Terror upon terror!). Praise be those days are behind me.

The penguin speaketh the truth.